


The Best You Ever Had

by lullatone



Series: is that why they call you... [2]
Category: 9-1-1 (TV)
Genre: Bottom Eddie, Fluff, Love Confessions, M/M, Sexting, Top Buck, big dick buck!!!, couch makeouts, in a relationship, size queen Eddie Diaz
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-30
Updated: 2020-05-30
Packaged: 2021-03-03 03:40:20
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,504
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24448234
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lullatone/pseuds/lullatone
Summary: (Sequel to 'Discarded All The Naughty Nights For Niceness')“You ready to prove yourself, firehose?”Buck snorts, resting his head on Eddie’s shoulder.“Really thought we were gonna let that go.”
Relationships: Evan "Buck" Buckley/Eddie Diaz (9-1-1 TV)
Series: is that why they call you... [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1935382
Comments: 13
Kudos: 486





	The Best You Ever Had

**Author's Note:**

> hi yall!! so my bottom eddie diaz fic was GONNA be a one time deal, but i had a ton of requests for a sequel sooo who am i to say no to you guys!!! this fic def got away from me and ended up much longer than i wouldve planned, but i actually really like it, and i hope you guys do too! (and if you havent read the fic before this, def do that!!)
> 
> EDIT: the texting bit got formatted to hell when i published this so i finally fixed it and now bucks text is in bold italics!

Buck does in fact take Eddie for dinner first.

It’s nothing special, a burger joint a mile away from the station that knows most of the 118’s orders by heart. Buck grabs a spot near the window so they can enjoy the last bits of sunlight over the city and Eddie lets their knees knock underneath the table, because he can, because this is a _date_.

It goes _really_ fucking well. It feels like every other time they’ve hung out, except now Eddie can reach over and wipe the smear of ketchup away from the corner of Buck’s lip with his thumb without worry, and be met with a pair of sparkling baby blues and a smile that’s like the sun poking through the sky on a cloudy day. 

It’s just like before, except as they walk back to the station to pick up their cars, Eddie lets Buck take his hand and lace their fingers together as they walk side by side. 

They’re stepping into the parking lot when Eddie’s stomach turns, suddenly remembering the way he propositioned Buck back in the showers.

_“Wanna come over and prove you know how to use that thing?”_

He had meant it then, and he still means it now. Just….less so. 

Eddie’s lost in his head, gears turning wildly when Buck stops walking, keeping Eddie in place with a firm hand on his arm. 

When he looks at Buck, there’s a worried look on his face, teeth gnawing on his bottom lip. 

“Okay, I’m just gonna put this out there. As much as I want to, I am _not_ ready to have sex with you tonight.”

Eddie almost falls over in relief. “ _Ohthankgod_ , neither am I.”

And they both laugh themselves silly in the parking lot, and it’s really not a big deal and Eddie loves that. Sure, he wants to press Buck into the mattress and ride him until the sun comes up but there’ll be time for that. They’ve got all the time in the world.

Dating Buck proves to be easier than most things.

Sure, the mountain of paperwork and the stern words they receive from Bobby about _‘professionalism’_ and ' _HR nightmares’_ aren’t very fun, but the way he kicks them out of his office with a smile on his face makes it all worth it.

Buck seamlessly fits into Eddie and Christopher's life, as if he wasn’t already doing it before. Date nights are few and far between when you’re both firefighters and one of you has a son, but every time Eddie stumbles out an apology about cancelling, Buck never says a harsh word.

Instead, he simply shows up to Eddies with whatever dinner he’d been preparing for them that night, an extra helping for the kid that attaches himself to Buck’s legs as soon as he walks in. 

It’s one of those nights in particular, Chris making it about halfway through Finding Dory before then promptly passing out pressed into Buck’s side. Eddie can only look on with fondness as Buck runs a hand through the boy's curly hair.

“Guess that dessert you brought over finally got to him.”

Buck chuckles. “You’re the one who said he could have two pieces of pie. And if you have pie, you _need_ to have ice cream with it.” Eddie just shakes his head, pausing the movie before rising off the couch and scooping up his son into his arms. Christopher makes a grumbling sort of noise as he tucks his head into his father's shoulder, Eddie running a soothing hand down his back.

“Time for bed buddy. Let’s get you into some pajamas.” Chris nods sleepily as Eddie carries him from the room and down the hall. 

After wrangling his son into pajamas and under the covers, Eddie comes back out into the living room to find two beers on the coffee table, Buck lounging in the corner of the couch on his phone. He looks up when he hears Eddie walk in, and it’s like seeing each other for the first time, every time.

Eddie grabs one of the beers as he sits, letting himself sink into the couch, arm coming up across the back of it to skim Buck’s shoulders. The quiet is nice, nothing in the room except the two of them….except the feeling deep down in Eddie’s gut. 

They’ve kissed a few times of course already. If they leave work at the same time, Buck likes to pull Eddie close in the parking lot and shower Eddie with kisses on his cheeks and lips. They’re always light and full of sweetness in a way that’s indescribable, and it’s _nothing_ like the kisses now that Buck is-

Oh, yeah. They’re kissing. 

Eddie isn’t sure how that happened. 

He has a feeling his brain shut off when Buck was giving him a sultry look over the top of his beer bottle, and decided to turn back on again when Eddie was straddling Buck’s thighs, hands creeping into golden hair while Buck kissed him in a way that definitely wasn’t sweet. 

It’s a filthy kind of kiss, Buck licking into Eddie’s mouth with a determination that is _extremely_ hot. It’s like he’s trying to trace every part that he can reach, whether it be with his hands or tongue or lips, and Eddie thinks he could probably let Buck touch him like this forever. 

A hand creeps up under Eddie’s henley, and Buck groans as he feels warm skin. He pulls back for the first time since they’ve started, and Eddie misses the contact almost immediately.

“Christ, Eds. Wanted to touch you since the first day I saw you.” Eddie smirks at that, a bolt of pride running through his chest at the thought of Buck wanting in the same way he’s been.

Eddie leans back in, lips almost touching Buck’s but not quiet. He can feel warm breath against his, and tightens the grip he has in Buck’s hair. Buck bites his lip in order to hide a groan, and that brings another smile to Eddie’s face.

“Then touch me.”

Buck doesn’t need to be told twice, one hand running up and down Eddie’s abs while the other grabs Eddie’s thigh, anchoring him in his lap. Eddie closes the gap between their lips, enjoying the way Buck’s feel soft and warm against his. 

It feels like they’re kissing forever, the slick slide of lips turning into something slow and sweet, time blurring together into a wonderful haze that Eddie wouldn’t give up for anything.

One of Buck’s hands has wandered past Eddie’s thigh to his ass and Eddie hips jerk when Buck _squeezes_. Buck smiles against Eddie’s lips, breaking the kiss for the first time in what feels like hours.

“Anyone ever told you you’ve got a great butt?”

“No, never. You must be the first.” Buck rolls his eyes, taking his hand that had been up Eddie’s shirt and placing it alongside the other. He squeezes again, pulling Eddie that much closer in his lap and they both groan. It’s loud, louder than it ought to be with a kid in the house, and Eddie’s words are hushed. “ _Buck, we need to be quiet_.” 

He feels Buck’s breath against his ear, hot and panting as he noses at Eddie’s neck. Buck just nods before his hands go to work again, kneading skin through Eddie’s jeans and rolling his hips.

It’s fucking _blissful_ when Eddie feels Buck’s dick through his jeans. Eddie wants to keep a rhythm, pull Buck’s hair, kiss him, do _something,_ except all he can do is hold on to Buck’s shoulders and hang on for the ride as his hips take on a mind of their own. 

_‘We shouldn’t be doing this, we shouldn’t be doing this-’_ runs through Eddie’s head like an emergency broadcast, flashing red in his mind. 

But nothing matters right now except the hot blood coursing through his veins and the feeling of Buck’s dick, hard and wanting underneath him. 

Here he is, a grown man in his 30’s, humping his boyfriend on the couch and it’s the hottest thing Eddie has done in fucking ages. 

He wonders if he could come like this, just from Buck grinding into him and nipping his neck, and he thinks he might, just a little more maybe he could-

_“Daddy! Buck! Can you come here? My tummy hurts!”_

Eddie almost falls off the couch.

Thankfully Bucks grip on him is a good one, and he’s able to stay upright as the two get some distance. Buck looks like he’s just seen a ghost, and the red flush that’s all over his face makes Eddie laugh.

Buck pouts. “S’not funny.” 

Eddie decides that it _is_ funny, because he laughs so hard he chokes a little, slowly peeling himself off Buck and standing next to the couch on shaky legs. Eddie has to hold his gut with one hand and wipe his eye with another as he answers his son.

“One sec bud, I’ll be there!” He takes one look at Buck’s face and bursts into laughter again.

When he’s finally composed himself enough, he adjusts his pants _(not like there’s much to adjust anyway, since your son scaring the piss out of you will stamp out any feelings of arousal),_ and leans down to place a soft kiss on Buck’s forehead. 

“New rule,” he says, lips still against Buck’s skin. “None of that with Chris in the house.” 

Buck laughs, his embarrassment finally fading.

“Okay, deal.”

It turns out to be an easy agreement to keep, since Buck and Eddie find themselves on a string of opposite shifts and 24 hour days that leave them no alone time at all. The most they’ve gotten is some time sitting next to each other on the firehouse couch, and quick phone calls at night that don’t last more than a few minutes. If Eddie doesn’t have the energy for that, he likes to send a few messages, sweet little blurbs that he knows will make Buck smile.

Eddie’s found that he’s better at the mushy stuff over text.

>>>> _I miss you_

_ >>>> You looked so good today at work _

_ >>>> I wish our shifts had lined up :( _

Eddie had gotten off a 24 hour shift when Buck had been rolling in for a shift that he picked up on a whim. Someone had been sick and Bobby needed an extra hand for a few hours, and Buck had volunteered without having to be asked. If Eddie was right, Buck should be home by now.

He rolls over in bed, checking the clock. 11:30. He really ought to sleep. Eddie knows that he needs it, could really use the rest before his shift tomorrow, but he wants to talk to Buck. Wants to read his words and know that he’s alive and well and curled in bed, just like he is right now.

Eddie’s letting his eyes shut for a moment when his phone buzzes on the nightstand. He scoops it up fast as lightning, like a teenage girl waiting hours for her crush to finally reply, when in reality it’s been like….five minutes.

**_< <<<sorry was in the shower! miss you too_ **

_ >>>>In the shower? Without me? ;) _

He can almost feel Buck roll his eyes from across town.

**_< <<<yes without you. even though it wouldve been nice to have you here_ **

_ >>>>Oh? It wouldve? _

Eddie isn’t sure what he’s trying to start, but that familiar heat in his gut tells him he knows _exactly_ what he’s doing. The bubbles appear and reappear for about a minute, as if Buck himself is thinking the same thing. 

**_< <<<mhhm. I bet youd look good in my shower_ **

Now _that_ sets a fire in Eddie, a possessive flame that licks up his spine and curls around his neck. Not that Buck has never told Eddie he looks good before, but Eddie in Buck’s space, in his apartment, is an idea he really likes.

_ >>>>What are you wearing? _

**_< <<<damn you’re not wasting any time here are you_ **

Eddie cringes at that, worried for a moment that he’s moving too fast or trying too hard when the bubbles appear again, Buck typing away.

**_< <<<just underwear_ **

**_< <<<and before you have to ask_ **

**_< <<<ive been thinking about you since i got out of the shower_ **

Eddie’s flushing, brain scrambling to figure out what the hell he wants to say when another message pings in.

**_< <<<im thinking about the way you looked the other day in the gym_ **

_**< <<<Its like you wear those tight shirts and shorts cause you KNOW itll get to me ** _

Listen, Eddie never said he was subtle. Or above making his boyfriend thirsty when they were at work. 

>>>> _Maybe i do. Does it bother you?_

**_< <<<are you kidding me? you looked like you wanted me to come over to the bench and get on top of you_ **

**_< <<<which is what Im thinking about doing rn_ **

_ >>>>Do you want to show me? _

The picture Eddie gets almost stops his heart.

He’s gotten a few pictures from Buck before, just rolled out of bed selfies and the occasional shirtless mirror picture that Eddie quickly saved to his camera roll (with Buck’s permission of course).

It's taken from above, angled in just the right way so Eddie can get a full view of everything that’s on display. The marks and dips in Buck’s stomach, the tattoos that cover his chest and arms. Buck’s hand is wrapped around himself, underwear long gone. He’s hard, dick curving up slightly towards his chest and Eddie thinks he may actually be drooling.

>>>> _Holy shit buck_

_ >>> What kind of shower did you take? _

**_< <<<one where i thought about you the whole time_ **

Eddie’s never been great at sexting. Dirty talk? Sure, just as long as it’s face to face. He can flirt like it’s nobody's business, but the second it becomes real? That’s where he starts to fumble.

He’s rubbing his palm against his dick through his shorts and he’s wondering what the _fuck_ he’s supposed to say. The voice in his head is screaming at him, _“just say what you feel, tell the truth! Just pretend it’s like he’s right here in front of you!”_

So he does.

_ >>>> fuck i want you in my mouth so bad _

The bubbles reappear, and disappear. Then reappear again. And disappear. And then nothing.

Eddie groans, shoving his face into his pillow. Of course he fucked up, of _course_ he did. He lets himself lay there, waiting for his phone to ding for what feels like forever. 

He was too forward, too much at once. Sure, Buck has sent him texts that were definitely not safe for work before, but maybe he hates the way Eddie does it, maybe he-

His phone dings.

**_< <<<sorry. couldnt wait_ **

The picture that follows is another overhead view, Buck’s stomach and hand covered in cum.

Eddie can firmly say it’s one of the hottest things he’s ever seen, and its a grainy slightly blurry iPhone photo. 

_ >>>> all it took was a text from me??? _

Eddie isn’t sure why he’s teasing Buck when he’s fairly sure that picture made him stop breathing. He’s also _much_ harder than he was a minute or two ago. 

**_< <<<oh shut up _ **

**_< <<<and yes it DID work _ **

**_< <<<dont know how else to prove to you that you turn me on_ **

**_< <<<ya know, besides jerking it to the thought of you sucking me off_ **

Oh damn.

Eddie realizes he shouldn’t be one to talk, because now he’s in a mad rush to kick his shorts off his legs and get a hand around his dick because, Buck thinking about him? Yeah that’s making him feel some type of way. 

He wishes he had the patience to grab the lube out of his bedside drawer, finger himself open and make it so he comes so hard he can’t move, but that’s not what he wants right now. Right now he wants it hard and fast, wants to see sparks behind his eyelids as he strokes himself and imagines it’s Buck’s hand instead of his.

He wipes his hand on the covers, picking up his phone (that yeah, he’s gonna need to sanitize) and sending off another quick text.

_ >>>> tell me more _

Eddie closes his eyes, taking deep breaths as he tries to calm himself. He doesn’t want this to be over before he knows what Buck has to say, what Buck wants to _do_ to him. It’s slow strokes for now, too loose to really get him going but enough to keep him interested. 

He’s wondering how long he’ll be able to wait when his phone finally lights up.

**_< <<<i know youd look so good on your knees. youd be in total control eds. fuck would you let me pull your hair_ **

**_< <<<youre such a cheeky bastard when were at work, looking at me like that in front of everyone else_ **

**_< <<<like you could say or do just the right thing and id beg for it_ **

**_< <<<and you know i would_ **

Eddie’s eyes start to water as he reads the text over and over, worried that if he blinks it’ll disappear forever. 

_‘And you know I would’._

Eddie’s cock twitches in interest at the thought of it, and he throws the phone to the side of the bed, replaying the message over and over in his head.

He _could_ get Buck to beg for it. It wouldn’t be hard. A few well timed glances, maybe a lip bite or two. Eddie could play Buck like a fiddle, and they both know it. 

Before Eddie can stop himself he's coming into his fist, head thrown back against the pillows with Buck’s name on his lips, the same way it’s been for months now. He grabs a tissue off the nightstand, wiping his hand and stomach. He turns over onto his front, nestling his chin into the pillow. Eddie grabs his phone, the post orgasm warmth filling his chest and making him feel tired for the first time all night.

_ >>>> No picture, but that did the trick _

_**< <<<thats okay, sure its better in person anyway ;) ** _

Eddie snorts, but can’t stop the smile on his face. 

_ >>>> Wish you were here. Could use a cuddle right now _

**_< <<<ur such a sap_ **

**_< <<<but me too _ **

**_< <<<itll happen soon_ **

_ >>>> Promise? _

**_< <<<promise._ **

As promises go, it gets fulfilled sooner than they’d both think.

It's the night after their 10th (11th, 15th?? They've lost count) date, and Chris is sleeping over at the Wilsons with Denny and they can _finally_ be alone.

Eddie pulled Buck into the bedroom as soon as they got back to his place, shoving Buck onto the sheets and relishing in the way he laughs as his head hits the pillows.

Buck’s gorgeous all the time, but when he laughs? Eddie wants to bottle it up and keep it on a shelf, forever preserved and there at a moments notice for when Eddie wants to feel _this_. The sparks that dance behind his eyes, the way his belly warms and his heart pounds against his chest. 

He wonders if he’ll ever get over how much he enjoys kissing Buck, arms bracketed on the sides of his head, enjoying the way Buck whines softly when Eddie presses his weight down on top of him. 

Every time Buck makes a soft little noise, Eddie’s chest aches. It’s been happening more often than not lately, that feeling like his hearts going to swell up and push its way out of his chest. It rears its head when Buck is playing with Chris before dinner, or when he squeezes Eddie’s hand tightly after a shift. 

Eddie can’t decipher what it means just yet, so he’s mostly been ignoring it, pushing it to the back of his brain. Either he’s feeling strong emotions that a good long therapy session with Frank would help, or….maybe he’s dying, who knows. 

He’s finally been able to detach himself from Buck long enough to get his shirt off, and thank god for that, because seeing all of his tattoos and muscles up close is a treat. Eddie’s a few seconds into his staring when he wonders if he’s still any good with his tongue, and decides to find out by leaning down and licking Buck’s nipple into his mouth.

From the nails that scrape down Eddie’s shoulders and the loud whine that Buck lets out, he’s pretty sure he’s still got it. 

It makes him dizzy, the sounds he pulls from Buck. Every moan, every hitched breath feels like a shot to the heart. When Eddie travels downward and nuzzles at Buck's hipbone, kisses the skin softly, Buck laughs again in delight and _yeah_ , he thinks he could do this forever. 

Eddie’s hand is undoing the button on Buck’s jeans when a hand comes to rest on his shoulder.

“Slow down a sec.” Eddie looks up, worried until he sees the smirk on Buck’s flushed face. “You’re wearing too many clothes. I need to level the playing field.” 

Eddie laughs, sitting up and kneeling so Buck can do the same and divest him of his shirt. It takes them a minute, too many stolen kisses in between, but Buck practically sighs in relief once he’s able to throw Eddie’s shirt off into the corner of the room.

“God Eddie…” He cuts himself off, leaning back into Eddie’s space and pulling him close, arms wrapping around Eddie’s middle. His mouth latches on to Eddie’s neck and Eddie can’t help the way his hips twitch against Bucks, the rub of denim on denim infuriatingly good. 

Buck bites down, and Eddie can almost feel the purple bruise that’s no doubt forming on his neck, and he can’t wait to wear it tomorrow with pride. 

Eddie’s hands drift down to Buck’s waist, fingers dipping down into the band as he tries to undo the button for the 2nd time. He wishes he wasn’t so impatient tonight, but he’s excited to finally see in person what got them to this point in the first place.

“You ready to prove yourself, _firehose_?”

Buck snorts, resting his head on Eddie’s shoulder. 

“ _Really_ thought we were gonna let that go.”

“Oh, in your dreams.” Eddie finishes pulling down Buck’s zipper and leans back, putting a hand on Buck’s chest and guiding him back down to the pillows. 

Wriggling Buck’s pants off is a bit of a challenge, his tight jeans that he swore were fashionable clinging to his muscular thighs. His underwear follows suit, and yeah. Buck wasn’t lying.

The picture Eddie had gotten over a week ago didn’t do it justice. Eddie didn’t realize anyones cock could be _pretty_ , but Buck continues to prove him wrong. It curves up towards his stomach, leaving pre-cum on the skin and Eddie has to stop himself from leaning down and licking it off.

God, Eddie wants this. He really does. 

He pulls off his own jeans and underwear as fast as he can, crawling up Buck’s body once he’s done. It feels so good to kiss again, wandering hands having much more to explore and touch. Eddie can feel Buck against him, and he’s prepared to do as much or as little as Buck wants tonight, but he’s so needy that if he doesn’t speak his mind he’ll explode.

He speaks in between kisses, like if he stops kissing Buck he’ll most surely disappear, waking up from the world's most amazing wet dream. 

“I need-I need you to fuck me.”

Buck’s eyes go as wide as dinner plates, and Eddie would laugh again if he wasn’t so turned on.

“You sure?”

“Absolutely.”

Before Eddie can even blink, Buck has them flipped and yep, okay, he can check ‘brute strength’ off as another Buck specific kink he’s discovered he has.

“You have lube?” 

Ah shit. Eddie grimaces for a moment, nodding towards the door. 

“Bathroom, bottom drawer.” 

Buck practically runs to go get it, and almost jumps back onto the bed when he returns.

“You really oughta keep this thing closer to the bed,” says Buck as he squirts out a generous amount onto his fingers.

“I mean I usually do but…” Buck raises an eyebrow, another thing that shouldn’t be so damn cute. “Before we went out. I showered and kinda, got a head start on things.”

Buck’s eyes go dark and he licks his lips, taking a hand and spreading Eddie’s legs apart. 

The earlier prep helped, taking away the initial burn of the act that always makes Eddie stop in his tracks, makes him take deep breaths as he soothes his way into it. 

Bucks fingers are so much better than his own. Thicker, longer, able to curve the right way to make Eddie shiver. It also helps that since it’s not himself, he doesn’t know what Buck will do next, the anticipation building in his chest as Buck removes his finger.

“Don’t worry. Just adding another.” Buck’s voice is soft and soothing, but raw around the edges. He’s affected by this just as much as Eddie, and he’s not even the one getting fingered. 

With two fingers now it’s a stretch that makes Eddie’s breath catch in his throat, and when Buck’s fingers curve up and press in just the right spot, he almost chokes on his tongue.

“ _Fuck_ Eddie. I wish you could see yourself right now.” Buck looks too cheeky for his own good, repeating the move again and for a second Eddie wonders if this is what getting fucking electrified feels like. 

He grinds down against Buck’s fingers, back arching against the sheets. “You’re doing so good Buck, so good for me.”

That spurs Buck on even more, and Eddie can’t wait to use _that_ new piece of information every chance he gets. 

It goes on like that for a while, Buck pressing into Eddie and making him squirm, adding another finger in and taking his time in making sure that he’s ready. Eddie loves it and he hates it, because it’s the best thing to ever happen to him, but he also wants it to be over with so Buck can replace his fingers with his dick and press Eddie into the mattress. 

When Buck deems him prepped enough, Eddie reaches into the side table and pulls out a box of condoms, tearing at the plastic on the outside.

“Ooh, fresh box”, says Buck, as he catches the silver square that Eddie tosses to him. “I feel special.”

There’s some maneuvering as Eddie makes himself comfortable at the head of the bed, and when Buck gets his hands on his thighs, for the first time all night he feels incredibly nervous.

Yes, he’s prepped, and _yes_ he wants this. There’s still just the innate fear of seeing a dick and thinking, “and that's gonna get in me, _how_?”

Buck leans down, pressing a kiss right above Eddie’s navel. 

“M’gonna take it slow, alright?” 

Eddie nods, reaching down and brushing a hand through Buck’s hair. He trusts him completely, knows that Buck won’t do anything to hurt him. 

It’s slow going at first, Buck’s hand anchored on Eddie’s thighs as he presses in. The first thing Eddie notices is that it’s a totally different feeling from his fingers, or even Bucks. The press, the weight of it all is so foreign but _god_ does it feel good. 

Eddie thinks that all the air gets sucked out of the room when Buck finally bottoms out. He feels full, like he’s at his brink and anything other than this would be too much, but _this_? He gets the hype, gets why men and women alike were swiping right on Buck’s profile.

He doesn’t actually tell Buck to move, instead just makes some noises that Buck interprets correctly as _‘move now PLEASE, before I die’_ , and Buck’s pulling out and pushing back in and it’s a slick glide that has Eddie’s mouth going slack. 

It’s incredible, but he knows Buck is holding back on him. He needs it harder, faster, needs Buck to make him feel it tomorrow. He reaches up and grabs Buck by the hair, pulling him down to get them chest to chest. It’s a new position that Eddie thinks he’s gonna love, their lips mashing together in a kiss that's all fervor and no grace. 

Eddie guides Buck’s head away for just a moment, enough to let him catch his breath so he can speak. He doesn’t realize how wrecked his voice is until he finds the power to speak, his voice like a deep growl more than anything else. 

“Come on-Buck- _baby_.”

Buck fucking whines into Eddie’s ear, grabbing Eddie’s thigh and hiking it around his waist. The new angle allows for Buck to go deeper, and Eddie grabs harder at Buck’s shoulders, making sure they stay connected. 

Eddie wants to be as close to Buck as he can be, wants to feel every inch of him, warm skin against skin.

He can’t remember the last time he’s felt so taken care of, so connected to someone, so desperate to absorb every inch of the man he’s sharing his bed with. Eddie’s brain feels like it’s overloading, emotions backing up as they try to sort themselves out.

He feels too much and not enough at the same time.

He feels, he feels-

He feels loved.

 _“Oh shit”_ he thinks, and suddenly everything he’s feeling makes sense and he wants to slap himself for being so dense, for waiting so long to realize.

Buck feels Eddie tense up and stops. He pushes himself up on his elbows, panic written all over his face. 

“Fuck oh my god Eddie are you okay? Did I hurt yo-“

Eddie smiles, because of _course_ Buck’s adorable when he’s worried. “No, no Buck stop you're okay. I'm fine.” Once it's clear that Buck believes him, Eddie places a hand on his cheek, thumb stroking the soft skin.

“I just uh-I realized something.”

Buck gets that look on his face that can only be described as ‘excited puppy wagging his tail’, and Eddie’s chest aches again, but now he isn’t worried about it. “Is it a good something?”

“Yeah. Or at least I think it is. And i'm not sure if this is the time or place for it-“ Eddie looks to the side, a moment of embarrassment. 

Buck presses a kiss to his chest. “Whatever it is, tell me.”

Eddie takes a deep breath, turning back to look at Buck. He has to-no. _Needs_ to look at him for this. 

“I love you Buck.”

For the second time that night, Buck looks shell shocked. Eddie’s worried again that he’s ruined the moment, but then Buck is kissing him like the fate of the earth depends on it, and he’s licking into Eddie’s mouth and letting go far too fast to say,

“I love you too.”

And then Buck is thrusting again, hard and fast, the bed creaking like it’s going to fall apart but he just said _‘I love you’_ and he meant it, and yeah Eddie realizes pretty quickly that he’s not gonna last long. 

He hasn’t come just from fingering himself before, but he has his suspicions that _this_ is gonna yield different results. Buck’s hammering that spot again, making Eddie see stars on the bedroom ceiling, and he wonders if this is gonna do it, the warm heat pooling quicker in his gut than before. 

When Eddie comes untouched for the first time in his life, he’s fairly sure his soul takes a trip somewhere else for just a minute. When it’s safely back in his body, he can feel Buck tense up as well, hips losing their strength as he inhales sharply and comes. 

There’s a blanket of quiet that comes down over the room after, the only sounds being that of Buck and Eddie trying to catch their breath. Eddie would say more, except he feels like his ability to form coherent sentences went out the window a while ago.

Eddie makes a displeased noise when Buck pulls out and takes off the condom, leaving the room in favor of the bathroom. He returns with a damp cloth that he uses to clean Eddie's stomach and in between his legs. It’s a nice sensation, to have someone take care of him so intimately. He can’t wait to be able to do it for Buck, to make him feel the way he made him feel tonight. 

Once Buck’s taken care of him, he leaves the damp cloth on the nightstand, neglecting putting it into the bathroom in favor of returning to bed and nuzzling up into Eddie’s chest. He stinks like sweat and sex, but then again they probably _both_ smell like that. 

Eddie’s wondering what he should say as he wraps an arm around Buck’s shoulders, when he gets beaten to the punch.

Buck pokes him in the chest. “So. You _love_ me, huh?”

Cheeky bastard. 

“Yeah Buck.” Eddie presses a kiss to his hair. “I’m pretty sure I do.” 


End file.
